If you read my post yesterday Yesterday's Post you will know that I had a mission today. :) I thought it was going to be canceled or delayed due to a malfunctioning water heater, but it turns out it didn't slow me down as much as I thought it would. I was riding the train into the city wondering if talking to this homeless paper vendor was something I was really supposed to be doing or if it was just something that popped into my mind yesterday. I wasn't really feeling the tug I had felt yesterday, so I started second guessing myself.
And then there is that book I'm reading... "Most of us will someday realize that we didn't [notice the beauty in the midst of busyness] either. From the perspective of heaven, we'll look back on these days - these busy, cluttered days-and realize, That was Jesus playing the violin [on a street corner]. That was Jesus wearing the ragged clothes...The person needing my help was Jesus. ... when we love those in need, we are loving Jesus." italics are the authors - Max Lucado, Outlive Your Life.
There it was, just as I started to doubt, the encouragement I needed. I said a prayer for guidance - I say that so often I feel like giving it a number so I can just say - "Father, number 32 please!" Okay, that makes it sound like take out food way too much, but I digress. As I turned the corner and checked to see if he was at his normal post I felt the doubt and butterflies kick in. Not doubt that I was following what I was meant to do, but doubt in myself. I have to get out of my comfort zone is the thought that went through my mind at that point. Along with another realization. Who would try to stop me from telling someone about God? The next thought that entered my head was Satan stop it! And the butterflies went away. Just thinking back on that, it surprises me, although I know it shouldn't, that saying that worked. But it did.
So I walked up to the man, told him that God had been speaking to me a lot over the past two days about him and I wanted him to have the few dollars that I had in my hand. Then I introduced myself, his name is Manuel, and told him it was nice to meet him. And then I left because he looked terrified. LOLOL Maybe this interaction wasn't as much for Manuel's benefit as it was for mine. I've been wanting to challenge myself and I've been asking for God to use me, maybe this was His way of warming me up. Who knows why? But even though I may have made Manuel a little nervous - seriously, he kept looking behind me like he was hoping the men with the straight jackets were right behind me - I left the encounter with a big smile on my face and feeling wonderful.
And who knows? Maybe Manuel's story isn't over yet.
1 comment:
Good for you Mary. So often many of us won't step out of our comfort zones or even openly claim that we are a follower of Christ. Our pastor has been doing a series on heros in the bible. And has challenged us to do the hard thing. Which is what you have done. I have yet to do that, to walk up to someone that doesn't already know me and tell them I am a follower of Christ. It's not easy to do, we worry about scaring people or what they will think of us. Many times we just have to tell that voice in our head to be quiet and take that step.
Debbie
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